2004-08-07
who needs weed? i have turtlewax!
Well here is a new peak to my social life. A bunch of freshmen who will now be sophomores I suppose in that natural run of time, have invited me to a party. Of course I don't suppose this party will be anything grand or entertaining but the thought of attending said party has crossed my mind.
Kiddly-winks[woah-hoh that's a new one] I swear to you on all that is cheesecake that I will NOT be doing anything illegal. In fact, my intention is to watch the others get stoned out of their minds and do one of two things: a.)take pictures and later show them to their parents to feel vindicated over that stupid freshmen that pushed me in the hallway this year.[or was it last?] or b.)act incredibly stoned without doing anything so they can laugh at me and I can secretly be laughing back at them laughing at me[which is the way it is most of the time anyway]. Either way, I sure will be having fun without the complications and the messed up spinal fluids.
My other option on this Saturday evening is to sit at home while Miss Linguist goes out drinking and dancing with her grazny bitches[don't yell at me, it's from A Clockwork Orange]. I have spent many a Saturday night in summer doing the exact same thing as option B. So even though option A is slightly illegal with definite consequences, I am leaning my teeter-totter of thought that way. What's honestly the worst thing that could happen[arrestation you say...well I didn't mean you should be honest]
(Before I sign my life away, the smart course of action would be to see who would be attending said party. If there is someone I cannot stand for utterly moral reasons, then I will fake out sick. Not am I one to risk putting my soul in peril for cheap fun. Ok, not lately at least.)
A sidenote in this diarist's life: Yesterday night[or this morning] I talked in my sleep for the first time in recorded history. I was spending the night at Minnow's house[Beth is her real name and she is no relation to Fish whom I flashed in the past]and according to her, and her word holds the shield of truth, I turned over in my sleep and said "God damn all turtlewax." Which leads to the obvious question...what the hell could I possibly have against turtle wax?
Quote of the day:"If Elvis had eaten more chocolate and taken less drugs he would still be alive."-[Chocolate calendar 2005]